I will wear the collar...

Marks of Possession

Recently I was in a position in which I was not able to wear my collar due to certain circumstances. During that period my Master placed temporary marks on my skin. Some of them were done in simple sharpie, some were dine by light carving.

All this has left me wondering about permanent markings upon my body that cannot be removed. Tattoos, branding and scaring. What kind of significance does that lay on the heart of a slave?

Does it show? Is it hidden? What does it say/picture? Does the slave have a say?

Happy New Year... Here Is a New Contract

My Master and I rang in the New Year with a new (revised) contract. Yes, my Master and I have been going through contract negotiations for the last month or so. We tried it differently this time and He wrote it. In the past, I have always written what it was, but He decided that our new contract should have a different feel. So, He came up with a new one.
We set a deadline of NYE to make sure we had covered all basis, with a working draft in place. With exceptions of one or two items we already had accepted, we put our new contract into place with the New Year.

He surprised me, and almost broke my heart when we started the process signing a new contract (yes, we really have a paper copy that is really signed by both of us) He removed His collar. His reasoning was simple... I cannot agree of my free will while wearing His collar.

How do you handle your contract?

Collars

If you read long enough, you run into essays scolding how easy collars are put on and taken off. It is often referred to as a Velcro collar. If you keep reading you will read about how long it should take to get a collar and anything less is not taking it seriously. 

When talking about D/s or M/s relationships you inevitably run into the topic of collars.  For the purpose of this post, we are not talking about protection collars and such... just formal collars.


I read all of this and cry Bull Shit.

And here is why.

When I did my research on collars I likened it to an wedding ring. Whether there is or is not the same level of  commitment... some of that is just a sign of the times. However, as an over all statement, I don't think "time" is a indication of a level of commitment.

Master and I got engaged within 3 months of KNOWING each other and while we lived in different states.  Moved in together 3 months later. Got married almost a year and a half later (trust me it would have been sooner, we just had some outside issues that had to be resolved before we could). We will be celebrating our 6 year anniversary this month.

So the argument of there being a specific time has to be in place for a commitment doesn't fly for me.

And... what works for me may not work for you. Some people need that necessary time.

Having said all this, when Master and I entered into our D/s relationship, he did NOT present me with a collar the next day. Or the next week. Despite being married for 5 years, this was still another commitment. One that we were not taking for granted just because we were married. We decided years ago to get married based on one set of criteria. We were going to decide on a collar on another set.


Since then I have received my collar. I love my collar. He loves my collar. It is a commitment we both understand clearly. I wear my wedding ring understanding the commitment behind it and wear my collar understanding the commitment behind it. They are both very different and unique commitments we take very seriously.