Vacationing with Family

My Master and I are fairly new to living this lifestyle 24/7. That being said we have transitioned fairly comfortably to our rituals and expectations when we are at home. We have very few hiccups and know how things run.

Nothing challenges a status quo like a family vacation. I am not talking about Master and I going somewhere with just our children, I mean us going on vacation that is essentially a family reunion with his extended family. family. Did I mention we were camping for this 10 days to add to the ... chaos. 

Our first great long preponderance was whether I was going to wear my collar. There was just enough concern on our part whether it would be recognized for what it was, but without the understanding of what it truly meant.  He decided to leave it on, with the caviot if it became speculation we would remove it and figure out what I would wear. The good news is nobody remarked on it. 

What we didn't really discuss, and really should have, was how we were going to handle the interuption of rituals and such. At home it is easy. I call him Sir when the kids are awake (but not in their presence) and Master when they are asleep. I wear my leash from their bedtime to mine. I sit on the floor most of the time during TV/movie/game time (sometimes even when the kids are awake). I kneel at his feet in front of His bed in the morning and night and sometimes in the late afternoon. I get in the car after Him. I walk half a step behind him. I wait to eat till he starts. None of this is that unusual ... till it has a wrench thrown in it. 

There was never a time when we were really alone while we were awake, so titles went out the window. It was going to cause a lot of questions if I sat at his feet... especially since it rained 75% of the time we were there. Kneeling became difficult because lets face it.. our tent was not huge and it was on the ground. Made it uncomfortable for us both. And these are just some of the explanation. 

The reality is many of our rituals and protocols depended on some quiet alone time we were so used to. And while we were prepared for the one off situations, we were not prepared for an extended period of time for it to not be in place.

It was a good learning experience. Things to know how we can handle things differently. To make me feel more owned.

I am always curious how other couples/families who are in a D/s relationship handles such situations. 

Collars

If you read long enough, you run into essays scolding how easy collars are put on and taken off. It is often referred to as a Velcro collar. If you keep reading you will read about how long it should take to get a collar and anything less is not taking it seriously. 

When talking about D/s or M/s relationships you inevitably run into the topic of collars.  For the purpose of this post, we are not talking about protection collars and such... just formal collars.


I read all of this and cry Bull Shit.

And here is why.

When I did my research on collars I likened it to an wedding ring. Whether there is or is not the same level of  commitment... some of that is just a sign of the times. However, as an over all statement, I don't think "time" is a indication of a level of commitment.

Master and I got engaged within 3 months of KNOWING each other and while we lived in different states.  Moved in together 3 months later. Got married almost a year and a half later (trust me it would have been sooner, we just had some outside issues that had to be resolved before we could). We will be celebrating our 6 year anniversary this month.

So the argument of there being a specific time has to be in place for a commitment doesn't fly for me.

And... what works for me may not work for you. Some people need that necessary time.

Having said all this, when Master and I entered into our D/s relationship, he did NOT present me with a collar the next day. Or the next week. Despite being married for 5 years, this was still another commitment. One that we were not taking for granted just because we were married. We decided years ago to get married based on one set of criteria. We were going to decide on a collar on another set.


Since then I have received my collar. I love my collar. He loves my collar. It is a commitment we both understand clearly. I wear my wedding ring understanding the commitment behind it and wear my collar understanding the commitment behind it. They are both very different and unique commitments we take very seriously.

Kids and D/s

I do not claim to be an expert at this, in fact I claim a lot of ignorance and have much to learn about this lifestyle.

What I do claim is that I am a good mother. Of all the things I have done in my life, being a good mother is one of the things I take pride in. 

Which brings me to how we live day to day with our kids in the house. I will admit, it would be easier if they were all under 2. I will admit I am lucky that the youngest one only has a year left in elementary school. However, with pre-teens and teens in the house they start to watch how their parents behave. 

Part of our contract does state that He will not exhibit overt dominance in front of the children.  He is very good about that, but that doesn't mean that they may not notice how I walk a step behind him. Or that I typically tack on "if you don't mind" to the end of many of my plans when they are there. Or that I don't sit and eat until He does. When they notice little nuances we pass many things off simple "respect" because much of it can be summed up as that. 

Or maybe it is all in my mind. I always assume that my kids notice things (which I have been shown time and time again is not always true). Who knows. I do know that I will always encourage my children to find their own path. So when they are actually old enough to understand why their parents act differently than their friends parents will we talk to them about it... maybe. However, like any other "lifestyle" there is out there, it is not for everybody. I don't think D/s relationships are the only way. Just like I don't think "vanilla" relationships are for everybody (I hate the term vanilla).  The only thing that is important to me at the end of the day they are happy and healthy.

Their parents in a strong committed relationship that works for them allows for a happy healthy environment for our children. 

Now... just how to answer the question my son posed last night... "why is there a lock on your necklace". 

~smiles~

The Best Submissives . . .

Pledge to My Sir

my Pledge to you is to try and obey you in life
i promise to do my best to be honest with You in all things to the best of my abilities
my goal will be to make you feel happy and loved above all else
i will endeavor to serve you in all ways and trust You act in my best interest
my actions will be to ensure Your comfort of mind and body
i will aspire to show my love for You by bringing honor and respect in all that i do

i love You, Sir